Do you wonder what goes on in my mind in the middle of the night?

Of course, you do

I do too.

If I could explain an ounce of it without sounding utterly insane

Without you writing me off as a woman gone mad

Believe me, I would.

I simply want to be understood,

Though how can one be understood by others if one does not

Understand themselves first?

How can one be loved by others if one does not take the time

To fall in love with the good and bad and ugly of their character?

I scream silently, knowing I will inevitably drive you away.

I scream silently for it to stop,

For my worries to end,

For my troubles all to dissipate in a cloud of orange-white smoke.